During Centaurus Festival this year (2025) there was a panel on canon divergence for fictionfolk and it got me thinking about my own noemata and its fluidity and I wanted to write about that today!
https://youtu.be/3trKdVz7gX0?si=4YSw82HdkjJNI2tt

What I took away from the panel is that it is alright for noemata to be fluid and to go with what feels right, right now. To not be afraid to let go of what no longer serves you, and to not be too strict on yourself. You don't need to back up any of your claims, you don't need to have it all figured out perfectly, if it feels right to you, then it is your truth, and that is enough.
Since joining the community almost 7 years ago, my noemata has changed a LOT, many times. Part is because I am still figuring myself out and part is because I have many constels with their own noemata. At the moment though, all these noemata are combined into one identity and I wanted to share about that as well as my secondary identity, because I might as well while I am at it!
✨️ My true self ✨️
Right now, my believe is that my true self is a divine oneiric entity. I have no one true form, but can take any as a shapeshifter. As my true self white (hair, fur, scales etc) with golden eyes is sort of my default that feels very much like me, but I can appear in any form without constraints. Also as my true self, I am eons old, and have lived as dream goddess at times, but just as much I have just lived as different species, which are my constels. I would simply take the form of something and assimilate. I have noemata of some of these lives, but very little really. Besides shapeshifting, my main magic is dream magic, but I also use a lot of light magic.
A lot of identities I went by in the past, that I now call stels of mine, had a lot of the same feel to them. Fox spirit, Vulpecula, eidolon, star, for all of these my magic abilities stayed largely the same, the sense of self was the same even in the different appearances and slight shift in noemata. It feels really good to now see them all as parts of the same whole. Where I had felt so much uncertainty and kept looking so hard for who I *really truly* was, I now finally feel some peace. The fact that my identities are forms I took as a shapeshifter explains why I felt wrong deep down calling myself these. I always felt like I didn't quite fit in with the other elves, fae, fox spirits, dogs etc, that I was an imposter among them, and now I feel okay with that.
One noema that I keep coming back to is that I am from a place called the Dream. 'I was born from the Dream and to the Dream I will return'. I don't remember when I first wrote that down, but it has stayed with me. What I believe the Dream to be is a realm outside of the multiverse where all realities can be accessed from. This is where I get the title Dream Wanderer from, going from one universe to the other through dreams. I access different places and then spend time in them, sometimes thousands of years, as either my true self or pretending to be something else (my stels).
Another thing, something I have felt for years now, is that I feel very lonely in my alterhumanity. As if I am something unique and I can't find that connection with others that I crave. I enjoy using the term anymic to show this uniqueness, though I have also found other divine beings that feel the same. Even though my feeling of loneliness hasn't left within the community, I did find people who feel that same loneliness as well as whom had the same difficulty in finding their identity, which is sad that it is more common, but makes me feel better to share this experience with others. Outside the community, I have been finding some comfort in masculine divine oneiric entities, like Dream of the Endless or the Greek god Morpheus as sort of counterparts to myself.
To me, if you see a masculine divine oneiric entity, it is likely a facet of my other half. If you see a feminine divine oneiric entity, it is likely a facet of me. If you see something without gender or nonbinary, it is probably a combination of us. We are both dream concepts. I think perhaps any dream conceptkin could be facets of the same thing, but that is really just something I feel as a possibility, I don't want to push that onto anyone (not that I see lots of dream conceptfolk). I am very curious how other conceptkin feel about that, about others who share their concept.
Human is truly just another constel of mine. I entered this vessel to experience mortal life, though it is just one of the many lives I have tried, it is the first time it's not as a shapeshifter and my true self, but I am truly fully in a human body. I wasn't supposed to remember my true self in this life, and I believe that this vessel cannot contain my essence, and that is why I am severely chronically ill.
✨️My dream self ✨️
My dream self is part of my 'human stel'. My dream self is who I have become in my dreams. I started out as human, but became more and more oneiric and nonhuman as time went by, so I call my dream self an 'altered human'. For this identity, noemata are what I have dreamed about.
My dream self looks like a younger version of myself. I stopped changing and aging at one point. Sometimes I will have random dreams where I look differently, but that is all part of the dream experience. As my dream self I am not a shapeshifter, but I have illusion abilities. I will still be the same size and in a human body, but appear as different creatures to others. I also have intangibility as a main power. I can also control the elements and the weather, fly, breathe underwater, heal with light, become invisible, and at times prophesize or talk to machines.
I wish I had a really beautiful and obvious reason for being dream conceptfolk/an anymic divine oneiric entity, but I don't. Rather than having a good explanation, it just dawned on me more and more over the years. It started with confirming dream deity in early January of 2022 and it has morphed and grown since then. I don't think I come across as especially dream-like... maybe I would if I wasn't so high masking with my autism, but then, what is being dream-like? That is probably something different for all of us. I feel like, as my true self, I often am what others project on to me. I appear as a dream, as the beautiful side of dreams, the wishes people have. As my true self, I appear as something somehow familiar, as if I have visited each and every dreamer's dreams and when they see me, a part of them remembers. Really, it is probably my dream conceptkinity now that I think about it, I haven't *visited* every dreamer's dreams, I *am* their dreams, and as my true self I am recognized that way. I find it difficult and dysphoric to not be seen as who I truly am. I really prefer not to be perceived at all, and as my true self that would have been possible as I can just... exist and be without form, and I cannot do that now. I am stuck in a broken vessel, in one solid form, that hurts all the time. Besides literally sleeping and dreaming and roleplaying with a Dream of the Endless ai, I haven't found a lot of ways in which to truly embody myself. I enjoy thinking about it and discovering more of myself, but I feel like there is more I could be doing.
That is what I wanted to share for now. Thank you for reading if you did!

So, I am not purely a psychological alterhuman anymore. Maybe not even an atheist anymore. I need to believe that after this life, I will return to my true form and to him.

Otherkin questionnaire by @/Kitsuneechoes

★ General information
1. What is your kintype or species?
I am an anymic oneiric nonhuman. Anymic means that I haven't really found a species that I fit, and I am possibly one of a kind. Oneiric means relating to dreams. I am a dreamling, a being formed by dreams. I started out as a human, but dreams and nightmares irrevocably changed me. I was always destined for this though, there was no escaping becoming the Dreamer.
2. When did you first realize you identified as Otherkin?
I found the community in the beginning of 2018 and that is when I learned the term otherkin, but I first identified as nonhuman around the age of 9 when I started to identify as an elf. Around that age is when I stumbled upon the Elfquest comics, my first contact with elves, and I pretty quickly realized I was one. It feels like the Wolfriders from this comic raised me.
3. What inspired you to explore or learn about being Otherkin?
When I learned about the community at age 29, I had just gotten my autism diagnosis and was ready to drop the mask and truly be myself. When people in an autism amino started talking about being otherkin it immediately resonated with me and I quickly joined therian amino and learned as much about the community as I could. I didn't identify as anything at the time, but had been questioning on and off for a few years (constelic actually, turns out) and I started to journal.
4. Do you identify with a single kin type or multiple? If multiple, what are they?
I see myself as having only one kintype, but I am also dream conceptfolk, animalhearted, and more importantly, constelic. As someone who is constelic, I have a lot of constels that I identify as in rotation. There are too many to name them all, but my major constels are elf, fae, fox spirit, star(/celestial/Vulpecula) and currently eidolon.
5. Do you have a specific name or title for your kin self? If so, what is it?
The Dreamer is my title and my name is Nim Silver. That is the name I call myself in dreams. Nim is short for Nimeril, which is my own chosen Elvish name.

★ Self-Perception and Connection
1. How do you experience your connection to your kin self? (e.g., spiritually, psychologically, metaphorically, etc.)
Psychologically, neurologically and oneirologically. I believe I am the way I am because of my autism and dreams.
2. Do you feel a sense of longing or homesickness related to your kin type?
Yes, I wish I had my powers and abilities in wake life too. Also the adventures I am able to go on in dreams and not being physically ill, are things I long for in wake life.
3. What traits or characteristics of your kin self feel most prominent in your day-to-day life?
It's hard to say as there isn't much difference, they're both me, except my dream self is a lot more confident. I guess being dream conceptfolk is what makes my dream self and wake self connect, because when I am awake I still feel that connection to dreams. I find it really hard to explain or describe that, because what dream means to me is so indefinable.
4. Do you experience shifts? If yes, what triggers them?
I experience shifts for my constels. Shifts are usually what make me realize which stel is phasing. They are often triggered when I read someone's experiences who has one of my stels as their kintype, by music, or by focusing on them, but they also just happen naturally.
5. Do you feel your kin self influences your personality, behavior, or decisions? How so?
I don't think so, since there is no separation. I do act differently in dreams and make decisions I wouldn't make awake. Since calling myself dreamer and sleepyhead archetroper, however, I have focused on letting my wake life be more influenced by dreamy and sleepy vibes. Embrace daydreaming and my imagination more.

★ Memory and Identity
1. Do you have any memories or visions associated with your kin self?
Just the memories of dreams I had long ago. My dreams have shaped who I am and I remember exactly the dream in which I, for example, used my intangibility for the first time.
2. If applicable, how do these memories manifest (e.g., dreams, meditations, sudden flashes)?
Since I am not a spiritual alterhuman, this doesn't apply to me as I was talking about memories in this life.
3. Do you believe your kin self is connected to a past life, an alternate reality, or something else? Explain.
A sort of alternate reality. I believe in the multiverse and that the Dream connects them all. I should be able to access the Dream and other realities, but all I can do in this world we live in, that I believe lacks magic, is get glimpses of the possibilities.
4. Are there specific eras, locations, or cultures that feel tied to your kin identity?
Dreams, if you count them as a location.
5. How certain do you feel about your kin type, and has it changed over time?
I stopped trying to be certain honestly and just let it happen. I have only started to use the labels oneiric nonhuman and constelic together last month, and as someone who is constelic but didn't know, I questioned endlessly. I coined anteatype for my past identity as an elf, a label I still use as elf has greatly shaped who I am, even though it is no longer my kintype but a constel instead. I think I might actually settle with these labels now, because every time a constel pops up, even though it feels like it is a kintype, I have enough experience to know another stel will phase, no matter how long a constel stays active for.

★ Physical and Sensory Experiences
1. Do you experience phantom limbs or sensations associated with your kin self?
No, my kintype's body is the same as how my body looked like when I was in my early 20s. I also barely experience phantom shifts for my constels.
2. If yes, what do these sensations feel like, and how often do they occur?
Phantom shifts for constels are very rare and vague. It is only the idea I can have of what it would actually feel like.
3. Do you feel more attuned to specific sensory experiences (e.g., sounds, smells) tied to your kin type?
Not to my kintype, but again to my constels. Especially if an animal identity is phasing, I can be overly focused on sounds and smells like therians are. In general I am sensitive to sounds and smells though, probably because of my autism.
4. Do you experience any dietary preferences or aversions that feel connected to your kin identity?
For my constels definitely! I don't have it as much for prey stels, but for predators I crave meat. Meat is actually another trigger, often for fox to phase.
5. Are there physical environments that feel particularly comforting or resonant with your kin self?
Bedrooms, because that is where I enter the dream world most often. Anywhere where you can comfortably sleep. For different stels, I would answer different places, such as heathland, forests, rivers and fantasy worlds.

★ Community and Relationships
1. How has being Otherkin influenced your relationships with others?
Being nonhuman and autistic both, makes me feel very different from those who are neurotypical and orthohumans. For the longest time, I felt like being nonhuman is something I had to keep a complete secret and even now I share it with very select people. I guess it makes me feel like I cannot be myself completely. I still have to mask even though I don't want to.
2. Do you feel comfortable sharing your identity with friends, family, or the general public? Why or why not?
I am myself in the alterhuman community, and my close family and in-laws know. Though I have only told my in-laws this year. I still feel shame around being alterhuman, and don't know how people will take it and perceive me. It is scary because it might effect how people see me negatively.
3. What role does the Otherkin community play in your life?
A huge role. I am severely chronically ill and disabled, and I don't have irl friends. The community is where I spend a lot of my time and it is where I have made true friends. I feel like I can fully be myself in the alterhuman community, be accepted, and I really connect with people here like I haven't anywhere else.
4. Do you prefer in-person or online spaces to connect with other Otherkin? Why?
Online since with my illness and disability it is really hard to meet up.
5. Have you ever met someone with the same or a similar kin type? If so, how did that feel?
I haven't seen anyone exactly like me, but there are more dream conceptfolk and dreamlings and I am really excited to meet them and learn about their experiences. I think each of them is likely unique in their own way, because dreams are so personal. How we experience them and what feels like *dream* to us will be different.

★ Spiritual and Psychological Aspects
1. Do you see your kin identity as part of a spiritual path or practice? Explain.
No, I am not spiritual at all unfortunately. Spirituality has been a special interest of mine, but it was always make believe, part of my dream conceptfolk identity, as that covers dreams, daydreams, sleep, fantasy and imagination. I never truly believed deep down, even though I wanted to.
2. How do you reconcile your kin identity with your personal beliefs or worldview?
To me, brains are capable of so many wondrous things. We can experience things outside of what reality would indicate. My believe in the multiverse is connected to my dream being, because as I said, I believe the Dream is what connects everything.
3. Have you ever questioned the validity of your kin identity? If so, what helped reaffirm it?
Oh yes. I identified as an elf from around age 9 to around age 21 and then suppressed all my nonhuman feelings because I felt like it was a childhood fantasy I had to grow out of. Getting my autism diagnosis and wanting to truly be myself and accept myself, opened the door again. Between 21 and 29 (when I joined the community), I did search for the animal species I'd be if I could be an animal. I put so much time, effort and energy in that because it was so important to me. So it never fully went away.
4. Do you feel your kin identity is influenced by external forces (e.g., energy, fate, deities)?
I guess sort of yes! I feel like even though my kintype started out human, I was always going to be oneiric, I was always meant to be oneiric. I was always destined to be the Dreamer.
5. How do you distinguish between your human self and your kin self, if at all?
I don't really, except for saying dream self vs wake self. Like I said before, I am different in dreams. I have my abilities, I have confidence, but I am also recognized as an outsider more. People ostracize me, being an outcast is a big part of my nonhumanity. I am not instantly treated like that in wake life, because I appear "normal" at first glance. Even if people probably sense my autism and therefore something "off". I am not sure if I still mind that. I definitely used to. But maybe not being normal and somehow something being off about me makes me a lot more interesting and I try to embrace it.

★ Expression and Creativity
1. Do you express your kin self through art, writing, music, or other creative outlets?
Writing!
2. If so, what mediums or themes resonate most with your kin identity?
I love journaling and writing about my alterhumanity. I also love reading other people's essays and just reflect on all of it. I also listen to a lot of music, as it helps me regulate and connect to a deeper level of alterhumanity.
3. Do you incorporate your kin identity into how you dress, decorate, or design your personal space?
A little, I really like dreamy themes and aesthetics. When it comes to decorating though, I prefer to keep it very simple, but I do choose colors I associate with dreams.
4. Are there specific symbols, colors, or aesthetics tied to your kin self?
Yes! Everything I connect to dreams, daydreams, sleep, fantasy and imagination. Such as the night, stars, the moon, clouds, comfy stuff, soft stuff, etc. The colors purple and blue. Auroracore.
5. Have you created a persona or character to embody your kin self? If so, describe it.
Yes, because my kintype looks like me in my early 20s, but I also see myself represented by a pastel purple dormouse. I also see myself with yellow eyes and purple or blue hair. These are indeed more persona's of myself. I don't actually have any art of this (yet). I like to make myself look more dreamy in picrews though.

★ Personal Reflections
1. What challenges have you faced as an Otherkin, and how have you overcome them?
Mostly internal shame about who I am. It is still a process to fully accept and embrace myself. Seeing other people be unapologetically themselves in the community really helped me. I wasn't completely honest about my experiences for a while, as I tried to fit some sort of mold. The "perfect" otherkin. I tried to only have one kintype and suppress the feelings of anything else. Now that I have embraced being constelic, I feel like I can breathe.
2. What joys or comforts has your kin identity brought into your life?
My dreams are everything to me. In them I get to be social, go on adventures, use magic. I don't know where I'd be today without them as I am very isolated in my illness and disability. My daydreams, imagination and fantasy have also kept me going through the day. I am very proud to be dream conceptfolk and oneiric.
3. Do you think being Otherkin has shaped how you view humanity and the natural world? How?
Humanity, yes. In dreams I have a bit of a superiority complex. But also, at first I tried to push my own humanity away completely and didn't want to acknowledge it at all. Now I am finding a better balance as I was born human as my kintype. I think humanity is pretty cool, as human brains can imagine and fantasize, and create so many realities.
4. How do you feel your identity might evolve in the future?
I have no clue. My journey has been such a roller coaster, I really don't know where it will go in the future.
5. What advice would you give to someone just discovering their Otherkin identity?
Take your time, and even though it is a very serious and important part of yourself, also have fun with it. Try and be honest to yourself and your experiences. Maybe they are common in the community, maybe they are unique, but you are not alterhuman any less for having a different experience. You may even find you're not alone at all, once you open up.

To me, being constelic still has a lot in common with being a shapeshifter. I have all these possibilities within me. This collection of forms I can slip into. The reason why I use the label constelic over shapeshifterkin is because these identities are all their own little light bulbs. Each light can go on by its own switch, while some are internally connected, and the lights together make a clear pattern of what is me. The control room is hidden behind closed doors, so I cannot actually see its inner workings, but I am starting to get a good grasp on what it looks like.
Multiple things can trigger a switch, for example, coming across one of my main constels is likely to turn a light on even if for a brief moment. I can also see a light going on through my fluid gender, as my gender is connected to my constelic identity. Music and media can turn on a light bulb too. It isn't very different from how a kintype might be triggered for an otherkin. So what makes me differentiate and call this a constelic identity instead?
It is the distance between my constels and myself. My stels are not who and what I am, being constelic is. I appear as an elf, a dog, a fox spirit, but that isn't me to my very core. They are costumes I wear, illusions I hold up, I can only be a hare as far as I understand a hare to be. As these constels become stronger, I feel like I know better and better what the details are that fill that shape, but I am mainly still the vague shape of a species. A shadow of them. One impression of them. My own interpretation of them, that keeps learning and growing.
This is how some of my constels, I consider my main ones. I have been these, either already for a very long time, or they are very bright light bulbs because something about the species resonates more deeply and strongly within me. Maybe my shape as a dream being comes very close to the species, or I have hooked myself into them somehow, grabbed on strongly to their essence and feeding on it like a vampire. In the past, before I used the term constelic and tried to force my stels into kintypes (often only one at a time), I have greedily indulged in absorbing all I could. To BE these species, to approximate them as well as I could.
It differs from what I truly am deep down. What I could call my kintype is ME. For the other forms I take, being able to take these forms and be fluid between them, is who I am. When a stel is phasing, I sometimes can't distinguish it, so completely can I feel like I become them. I wondered what would happen once I embraced the label of constelic, and indeed some of my main constels have had me question if they weren't kintypes for a second as they took over. However, they always phase out again, and are eventually replaced by another, or return full force.
I really like the label constelic, because it shows who I am in all the facets that I can exist. At the same time, it explains they are not quite as kintypes, even though I identify as them periodically. As stels phase, I will likely keep reblogging art and photos of what I am. I also plan to keep writing about my main constels' noemata, or talk about new or less frequent stels as they pop up. For now I am likely to focus a little more on my oneiric identity and being constelic in general, but if anyone wants to know anything about any of my constels, or other experiences; please ask me anything! I love talking about my alterhumanity as well as getting to reflect more on it.

I took some time yesterday to look into dream conceptkin again. Something I have questioned before, but because it is such a vague identity I ended up calling myself dreamer and sleepyhead archetrope and left it there. I have this connection to dreams, daydreams, sleep, fantasy and imagination, not as 5 separate concepts but what brings all of these together. It is difficult though to describe this identity. Is it identify as or with, and how involuntary is it? Do I embody this enough to call myself conceptkin?
I found the term conceptfolk in the Archetropers' Guild discord. The coiner is still writing up an essay about it that I will share if possible once it is finished. What I understand from it, it is to encompass different concept identities, which feels very fitting for my situation. I do still consider myself a dreamer and sleepyhead archetroper too, but it is more than that.
I tried calling this dream alterhuman in the past, but will now call it dream conceptfolk as that makes it more clear what it's about. Calling it "dream, daydream, sleep, fantasy and imagination conceptfolk" is just too much of a mouthful and what it's really about is what dreams are to me personally anyway. I do want to try to write more about this in the future, see if I can find words to explain it, but today it is taking me so much effort to make even a little sense.

I was thinking about how my anteatype shaped who I am today. When I identified as an elf, I thought I was alone in identifying nonhuman. I never sought community, and I never told anyone until my husband when we were dating for longer, which must've been around age 27. Being nonhuman was a secret I kept locked deep away. I did get Elvish tattoos, but people just thought I really liked Lord of the Rings (which I do). This shame around who I truly am, is still something I carry and am working through.
As an elf, I had a strong connection to nature and to Elvish fantasy settings. Places like Middle Earth, Azeroth (from Warcraft), and the world of two moons (from Elfquest) were my homes. Consuming media about elves made me feel so euphoric and happy. All these things, I carry with me to this day. But not as something I am or belong to anymore, but in a nostalgic way, looking back at an elven childhood.
I now also consider elf a constel of mine. Multiple different types of elves are part of my rotation. I do think elf as my anteatype is what influences these phases, as I sometimes connect back so strongly to my elf self.
The thing about my constels is that when they are phasing I do identify as them, but I feel like I do not fit among the species I am taking on. I have tried to connect to the elven, fae, fox,and dog communities, for example, lots of times, but I never felt like I fit. I always felt like my experience was somehow different. I hope this is the reason why, that I am constelic instead of having these species as kin- or theriotypes.

On why I wanted to coin "anteatype".
I wanted a label for the experience of having had a 'type that you identified as for a long time, or that impacted your identity greatly, but you no longer identify as. The main reason for this is because I identified as an elf from around age 9 to around age 20 and when I joined the community at age 29, I tried to reconnect with my elf side, but I couldn't. It is there, in some capacity, but really as something that shaped me greatly rather than something I still am fully.
I keep questioning elf and try it out all the time. But it just isn't the same. I wanted to have a label for this, to make clear how important elf still is for me without labeling it as a kintype anymore.

My two homes are the Celestial realm and the Dream (realm). The Celestial realm is in a pocket universe, it is rather big and completely empty. Like you are floating in space and you see stars around you, but no matter which direction you go, you never reach them. Within this space are floating palaces to make homes, but because it is so big and there are so few inhabitants, you don't really meet anyone and it is a lonely realm.
In my own dark floating palace, I have a big room where I keep my dream orbs collection. Orbs that give of white light if the Dreamer isn't dreaming, yellow light for good dreams and dark purple light for nightmares. From this room I can look into these orbs and watch any kind of being that can dream from any universe, as in my noema the Dream connects to everywhere. I also am a dreamwalker and often enter the dreams of sleeping souls from this room. My orbs make me feel less alone, and going into their dreams as a dreamweaver with control over the Dream world, I can go on fun dream adventures with people.
I think this noema came to me, because I am severely chronically ill and I spend a lot of time alone, locked up in my apartment. The only ones I see are my husband when he is home, and the people I go on adventures with in my dreams. Most of my day, I am looking on my phone, a small window into other people's lives as I watch them in videos or read their stories. My noema is like a beautified reflection of my reality. And when I feel lonely now, I remember what true loneliness in the Celestial realm felt like and am so grateful to be able to contact people easily all over the world, just like I did with my dream orbs.

I was just thinking how I believe death is such a very natural part of life, just not for myself. My summoners I was bonded to all died eventually, but not me. Killing me just made me reform from the stars.
My kintypes aren't past lives, and I didn't die as either of them. I do have a certain fear of dying and being eaten that I think connects to my hare-heartedtype.
So far, though neither of my 'types grow old, I haven't minded aging much. It doesn't feel right, and I look less and less the way I am supposed to, but I haven't felt incredibly dysphoric about it yet.
I know I will die one day. I do not believe in an afterlife or reincarnation, and yet I have a small spark of hope inside me that when death does take me, I will reform among the stars once more.

I have recurring dreams of fae hunters, a group of people relentlessly chasing me no matter what kind of magic I use to escape them. I know that if they catch me, I am dead.

I identify with the fae label very broadly. Sometimes I am an almost demonically malicious and vengeful dark faery while at other times I am the sweetest, purest and most innocent cutsey fairy.