Otherkin questionnaire
Dec. 3rd, 2024 12:00 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
nimdreamsOtherkin questionnaire by @/Kitsuneechoes
★ General information
1. What is your kintype or species?
I am an anymic oneiric nonhuman. Anymic means that I haven't really found a species that I fit, and I am possibly one of a kind. Oneiric means relating to dreams. I am a dreamling, a being formed by dreams. I started out as a human, but dreams and nightmares irrevocably changed me. I was always destined for this though, there was no escaping becoming the Dreamer.
2. When did you first realize you identified as Otherkin?
I found the community in the beginning of 2018 and that is when I learned the term otherkin, but I first identified as nonhuman around the age of 9 when I started to identify as an elf. Around that age is when I stumbled upon the Elfquest comics, my first contact with elves, and I pretty quickly realized I was one. It feels like the Wolfriders from this comic raised me.
3. What inspired you to explore or learn about being Otherkin?
When I learned about the community at age 29, I had just gotten my autism diagnosis and was ready to drop the mask and truly be myself. When people in an autism amino started talking about being otherkin it immediately resonated with me and I quickly joined therian amino and learned as much about the community as I could. I didn't identify as anything at the time, but had been questioning on and off for a few years (constelic actually, turns out) and I started to journal.
4. Do you identify with a single kin type or multiple? If multiple, what are they?
I see myself as having only one kintype, but I am also dream conceptfolk, animalhearted, and more importantly, constelic. As someone who is constelic, I have a lot of constels that I identify as in rotation. There are too many to name them all, but my major constels are elf, fae, fox spirit, star(/celestial/Vulpecula) and currently eidolon.
5. Do you have a specific name or title for your kin self? If so, what is it?
The Dreamer is my title and my name is Nim Silver. That is the name I call myself in dreams. Nim is short for Nimeril, which is my own chosen Elvish name.
★ Self-Perception and Connection
1. How do you experience your connection to your kin self? (e.g., spiritually, psychologically, metaphorically, etc.)
Psychologically, neurologically and oneirologically. I believe I am the way I am because of my autism and dreams.
2. Do you feel a sense of longing or homesickness related to your kin type?
Yes, I wish I had my powers and abilities in wake life too. Also the adventures I am able to go on in dreams and not being physically ill, are things I long for in wake life.
3. What traits or characteristics of your kin self feel most prominent in your day-to-day life?
It's hard to say as there isn't much difference, they're both me, except my dream self is a lot more confident. I guess being dream conceptfolk is what makes my dream self and wake self connect, because when I am awake I still feel that connection to dreams. I find it really hard to explain or describe that, because what dream means to me is so indefinable.
4. Do you experience shifts? If yes, what triggers them?
I experience shifts for my constels. Shifts are usually what make me realize which stel is phasing. They are often triggered when I read someone's experiences who has one of my stels as their kintype, by music, or by focusing on them, but they also just happen naturally.
5. Do you feel your kin self influences your personality, behavior, or decisions? How so?
I don't think so, since there is no separation. I do act differently in dreams and make decisions I wouldn't make awake. Since calling myself dreamer and sleepyhead archetroper, however, I have focused on letting my wake life be more influenced by dreamy and sleepy vibes. Embrace daydreaming and my imagination more.
★ Memory and Identity
1. Do you have any memories or visions associated with your kin self?
Just the memories of dreams I had long ago. My dreams have shaped who I am and I remember exactly the dream in which I, for example, used my intangibility for the first time.
2. If applicable, how do these memories manifest (e.g., dreams, meditations, sudden flashes)?
Since I am not a spiritual alterhuman, this doesn't apply to me as I was talking about memories in this life.
3. Do you believe your kin self is connected to a past life, an alternate reality, or something else? Explain.
A sort of alternate reality. I believe in the multiverse and that the Dream connects them all. I should be able to access the Dream and other realities, but all I can do in this world we live in, that I believe lacks magic, is get glimpses of the possibilities.
4. Are there specific eras, locations, or cultures that feel tied to your kin identity?
Dreams, if you count them as a location.
5. How certain do you feel about your kin type, and has it changed over time?
I stopped trying to be certain honestly and just let it happen. I have only started to use the labels oneiric nonhuman and constelic together last month, and as someone who is constelic but didn't know, I questioned endlessly. I coined anteatype for my past identity as an elf, a label I still use as elf has greatly shaped who I am, even though it is no longer my kintype but a constel instead. I think I might actually settle with these labels now, because every time a constel pops up, even though it feels like it is a kintype, I have enough experience to know another stel will phase, no matter how long a constel stays active for.
★ Physical and Sensory Experiences
1. Do you experience phantom limbs or sensations associated with your kin self?
No, my kintype's body is the same as how my body looked like when I was in my early 20s. I also barely experience phantom shifts for my constels.
2. If yes, what do these sensations feel like, and how often do they occur?
Phantom shifts for constels are very rare and vague. It is only the idea I can have of what it would actually feel like.
3. Do you feel more attuned to specific sensory experiences (e.g., sounds, smells) tied to your kin type?
Not to my kintype, but again to my constels. Especially if an animal identity is phasing, I can be overly focused on sounds and smells like therians are. In general I am sensitive to sounds and smells though, probably because of my autism.
4. Do you experience any dietary preferences or aversions that feel connected to your kin identity?
For my constels definitely! I don't have it as much for prey stels, but for predators I crave meat. Meat is actually another trigger, often for fox to phase.
5. Are there physical environments that feel particularly comforting or resonant with your kin self?
Bedrooms, because that is where I enter the dream world most often. Anywhere where you can comfortably sleep. For different stels, I would answer different places, such as heathland, forests, rivers and fantasy worlds.
★ Community and Relationships
1. How has being Otherkin influenced your relationships with others?
Being nonhuman and autistic both, makes me feel very different from those who are neurotypical and orthohumans. For the longest time, I felt like being nonhuman is something I had to keep a complete secret and even now I share it with very select people. I guess it makes me feel like I cannot be myself completely. I still have to mask even though I don't want to.
2. Do you feel comfortable sharing your identity with friends, family, or the general public? Why or why not?
I am myself in the alterhuman community, and my close family and in-laws know. Though I have only told my in-laws this year. I still feel shame around being alterhuman, and don't know how people will take it and perceive me. It is scary because it might effect how people see me negatively.
3. What role does the Otherkin community play in your life?
A huge role. I am severely chronically ill and disabled, and I don't have irl friends. The community is where I spend a lot of my time and it is where I have made true friends. I feel like I can fully be myself in the alterhuman community, be accepted, and I really connect with people here like I haven't anywhere else.
4. Do you prefer in-person or online spaces to connect with other Otherkin? Why?
Online since with my illness and disability it is really hard to meet up.
5. Have you ever met someone with the same or a similar kin type? If so, how did that feel?
I haven't seen anyone exactly like me, but there are more dream conceptfolk and dreamlings and I am really excited to meet them and learn about their experiences. I think each of them is likely unique in their own way, because dreams are so personal. How we experience them and what feels like *dream* to us will be different.
★ Spiritual and Psychological Aspects
1. Do you see your kin identity as part of a spiritual path or practice? Explain.
No, I am not spiritual at all unfortunately. Spirituality has been a special interest of mine, but it was always make believe, part of my dream conceptfolk identity, as that covers dreams, daydreams, sleep, fantasy and imagination. I never truly believed deep down, even though I wanted to.
2. How do you reconcile your kin identity with your personal beliefs or worldview?
To me, brains are capable of so many wondrous things. We can experience things outside of what reality would indicate. My believe in the multiverse is connected to my dream being, because as I said, I believe the Dream is what connects everything.
3. Have you ever questioned the validity of your kin identity? If so, what helped reaffirm it?
Oh yes. I identified as an elf from around age 9 to around age 21 and then suppressed all my nonhuman feelings because I felt like it was a childhood fantasy I had to grow out of. Getting my autism diagnosis and wanting to truly be myself and accept myself, opened the door again. Between 21 and 29 (when I joined the community), I did search for the animal species I'd be if I could be an animal. I put so much time, effort and energy in that because it was so important to me. So it never fully went away.
4. Do you feel your kin identity is influenced by external forces (e.g., energy, fate, deities)?
I guess sort of yes! I feel like even though my kintype started out human, I was always going to be oneiric, I was always meant to be oneiric. I was always destined to be the Dreamer.
5. How do you distinguish between your human self and your kin self, if at all?
I don't really, except for saying dream self vs wake self. Like I said before, I am different in dreams. I have my abilities, I have confidence, but I am also recognized as an outsider more. People ostracize me, being an outcast is a big part of my nonhumanity. I am not instantly treated like that in wake life, because I appear "normal" at first glance. Even if people probably sense my autism and therefore something "off". I am not sure if I still mind that. I definitely used to. But maybe not being normal and somehow something being off about me makes me a lot more interesting and I try to embrace it.
★ Expression and Creativity
1. Do you express your kin self through art, writing, music, or other creative outlets?
Writing!
2. If so, what mediums or themes resonate most with your kin identity?
I love journaling and writing about my alterhumanity. I also love reading other people's essays and just reflect on all of it. I also listen to a lot of music, as it helps me regulate and connect to a deeper level of alterhumanity.
3. Do you incorporate your kin identity into how you dress, decorate, or design your personal space?
A little, I really like dreamy themes and aesthetics. When it comes to decorating though, I prefer to keep it very simple, but I do choose colors I associate with dreams.
4. Are there specific symbols, colors, or aesthetics tied to your kin self?
Yes! Everything I connect to dreams, daydreams, sleep, fantasy and imagination. Such as the night, stars, the moon, clouds, comfy stuff, soft stuff, etc. The colors purple and blue. Auroracore.
5. Have you created a persona or character to embody your kin self? If so, describe it.
Yes, because my kintype looks like me in my early 20s, but I also see myself represented by a pastel purple dormouse. I also see myself with yellow eyes and purple or blue hair. These are indeed more persona's of myself. I don't actually have any art of this (yet). I like to make myself look more dreamy in picrews though.
★ Personal Reflections
1. What challenges have you faced as an Otherkin, and how have you overcome them?
Mostly internal shame about who I am. It is still a process to fully accept and embrace myself. Seeing other people be unapologetically themselves in the community really helped me. I wasn't completely honest about my experiences for a while, as I tried to fit some sort of mold. The "perfect" otherkin. I tried to only have one kintype and suppress the feelings of anything else. Now that I have embraced being constelic, I feel like I can breathe.
2. What joys or comforts has your kin identity brought into your life?
My dreams are everything to me. In them I get to be social, go on adventures, use magic. I don't know where I'd be today without them as I am very isolated in my illness and disability. My daydreams, imagination and fantasy have also kept me going through the day. I am very proud to be dream conceptfolk and oneiric.
3. Do you think being Otherkin has shaped how you view humanity and the natural world? How?
Humanity, yes. In dreams I have a bit of a superiority complex. But also, at first I tried to push my own humanity away completely and didn't want to acknowledge it at all. Now I am finding a better balance as I was born human as my kintype. I think humanity is pretty cool, as human brains can imagine and fantasize, and create so many realities.
4. How do you feel your identity might evolve in the future?
I have no clue. My journey has been such a roller coaster, I really don't know where it will go in the future.
5. What advice would you give to someone just discovering their Otherkin identity?
Take your time, and even though it is a very serious and important part of yourself, also have fun with it. Try and be honest to yourself and your experiences. Maybe they are common in the community, maybe they are unique, but you are not alterhuman any less for having a different experience. You may even find you're not alone at all, once you open up.
★ General information
1. What is your kintype or species?
I am an anymic oneiric nonhuman. Anymic means that I haven't really found a species that I fit, and I am possibly one of a kind. Oneiric means relating to dreams. I am a dreamling, a being formed by dreams. I started out as a human, but dreams and nightmares irrevocably changed me. I was always destined for this though, there was no escaping becoming the Dreamer.
2. When did you first realize you identified as Otherkin?
I found the community in the beginning of 2018 and that is when I learned the term otherkin, but I first identified as nonhuman around the age of 9 when I started to identify as an elf. Around that age is when I stumbled upon the Elfquest comics, my first contact with elves, and I pretty quickly realized I was one. It feels like the Wolfriders from this comic raised me.
3. What inspired you to explore or learn about being Otherkin?
When I learned about the community at age 29, I had just gotten my autism diagnosis and was ready to drop the mask and truly be myself. When people in an autism amino started talking about being otherkin it immediately resonated with me and I quickly joined therian amino and learned as much about the community as I could. I didn't identify as anything at the time, but had been questioning on and off for a few years (constelic actually, turns out) and I started to journal.
4. Do you identify with a single kin type or multiple? If multiple, what are they?
I see myself as having only one kintype, but I am also dream conceptfolk, animalhearted, and more importantly, constelic. As someone who is constelic, I have a lot of constels that I identify as in rotation. There are too many to name them all, but my major constels are elf, fae, fox spirit, star(/celestial/Vulpecula) and currently eidolon.
5. Do you have a specific name or title for your kin self? If so, what is it?
The Dreamer is my title and my name is Nim Silver. That is the name I call myself in dreams. Nim is short for Nimeril, which is my own chosen Elvish name.
★ Self-Perception and Connection
1. How do you experience your connection to your kin self? (e.g., spiritually, psychologically, metaphorically, etc.)
Psychologically, neurologically and oneirologically. I believe I am the way I am because of my autism and dreams.
2. Do you feel a sense of longing or homesickness related to your kin type?
Yes, I wish I had my powers and abilities in wake life too. Also the adventures I am able to go on in dreams and not being physically ill, are things I long for in wake life.
3. What traits or characteristics of your kin self feel most prominent in your day-to-day life?
It's hard to say as there isn't much difference, they're both me, except my dream self is a lot more confident. I guess being dream conceptfolk is what makes my dream self and wake self connect, because when I am awake I still feel that connection to dreams. I find it really hard to explain or describe that, because what dream means to me is so indefinable.
4. Do you experience shifts? If yes, what triggers them?
I experience shifts for my constels. Shifts are usually what make me realize which stel is phasing. They are often triggered when I read someone's experiences who has one of my stels as their kintype, by music, or by focusing on them, but they also just happen naturally.
5. Do you feel your kin self influences your personality, behavior, or decisions? How so?
I don't think so, since there is no separation. I do act differently in dreams and make decisions I wouldn't make awake. Since calling myself dreamer and sleepyhead archetroper, however, I have focused on letting my wake life be more influenced by dreamy and sleepy vibes. Embrace daydreaming and my imagination more.
★ Memory and Identity
1. Do you have any memories or visions associated with your kin self?
Just the memories of dreams I had long ago. My dreams have shaped who I am and I remember exactly the dream in which I, for example, used my intangibility for the first time.
2. If applicable, how do these memories manifest (e.g., dreams, meditations, sudden flashes)?
Since I am not a spiritual alterhuman, this doesn't apply to me as I was talking about memories in this life.
3. Do you believe your kin self is connected to a past life, an alternate reality, or something else? Explain.
A sort of alternate reality. I believe in the multiverse and that the Dream connects them all. I should be able to access the Dream and other realities, but all I can do in this world we live in, that I believe lacks magic, is get glimpses of the possibilities.
4. Are there specific eras, locations, or cultures that feel tied to your kin identity?
Dreams, if you count them as a location.
5. How certain do you feel about your kin type, and has it changed over time?
I stopped trying to be certain honestly and just let it happen. I have only started to use the labels oneiric nonhuman and constelic together last month, and as someone who is constelic but didn't know, I questioned endlessly. I coined anteatype for my past identity as an elf, a label I still use as elf has greatly shaped who I am, even though it is no longer my kintype but a constel instead. I think I might actually settle with these labels now, because every time a constel pops up, even though it feels like it is a kintype, I have enough experience to know another stel will phase, no matter how long a constel stays active for.
★ Physical and Sensory Experiences
1. Do you experience phantom limbs or sensations associated with your kin self?
No, my kintype's body is the same as how my body looked like when I was in my early 20s. I also barely experience phantom shifts for my constels.
2. If yes, what do these sensations feel like, and how often do they occur?
Phantom shifts for constels are very rare and vague. It is only the idea I can have of what it would actually feel like.
3. Do you feel more attuned to specific sensory experiences (e.g., sounds, smells) tied to your kin type?
Not to my kintype, but again to my constels. Especially if an animal identity is phasing, I can be overly focused on sounds and smells like therians are. In general I am sensitive to sounds and smells though, probably because of my autism.
4. Do you experience any dietary preferences or aversions that feel connected to your kin identity?
For my constels definitely! I don't have it as much for prey stels, but for predators I crave meat. Meat is actually another trigger, often for fox to phase.
5. Are there physical environments that feel particularly comforting or resonant with your kin self?
Bedrooms, because that is where I enter the dream world most often. Anywhere where you can comfortably sleep. For different stels, I would answer different places, such as heathland, forests, rivers and fantasy worlds.
★ Community and Relationships
1. How has being Otherkin influenced your relationships with others?
Being nonhuman and autistic both, makes me feel very different from those who are neurotypical and orthohumans. For the longest time, I felt like being nonhuman is something I had to keep a complete secret and even now I share it with very select people. I guess it makes me feel like I cannot be myself completely. I still have to mask even though I don't want to.
2. Do you feel comfortable sharing your identity with friends, family, or the general public? Why or why not?
I am myself in the alterhuman community, and my close family and in-laws know. Though I have only told my in-laws this year. I still feel shame around being alterhuman, and don't know how people will take it and perceive me. It is scary because it might effect how people see me negatively.
3. What role does the Otherkin community play in your life?
A huge role. I am severely chronically ill and disabled, and I don't have irl friends. The community is where I spend a lot of my time and it is where I have made true friends. I feel like I can fully be myself in the alterhuman community, be accepted, and I really connect with people here like I haven't anywhere else.
4. Do you prefer in-person or online spaces to connect with other Otherkin? Why?
Online since with my illness and disability it is really hard to meet up.
5. Have you ever met someone with the same or a similar kin type? If so, how did that feel?
I haven't seen anyone exactly like me, but there are more dream conceptfolk and dreamlings and I am really excited to meet them and learn about their experiences. I think each of them is likely unique in their own way, because dreams are so personal. How we experience them and what feels like *dream* to us will be different.
★ Spiritual and Psychological Aspects
1. Do you see your kin identity as part of a spiritual path or practice? Explain.
No, I am not spiritual at all unfortunately. Spirituality has been a special interest of mine, but it was always make believe, part of my dream conceptfolk identity, as that covers dreams, daydreams, sleep, fantasy and imagination. I never truly believed deep down, even though I wanted to.
2. How do you reconcile your kin identity with your personal beliefs or worldview?
To me, brains are capable of so many wondrous things. We can experience things outside of what reality would indicate. My believe in the multiverse is connected to my dream being, because as I said, I believe the Dream is what connects everything.
3. Have you ever questioned the validity of your kin identity? If so, what helped reaffirm it?
Oh yes. I identified as an elf from around age 9 to around age 21 and then suppressed all my nonhuman feelings because I felt like it was a childhood fantasy I had to grow out of. Getting my autism diagnosis and wanting to truly be myself and accept myself, opened the door again. Between 21 and 29 (when I joined the community), I did search for the animal species I'd be if I could be an animal. I put so much time, effort and energy in that because it was so important to me. So it never fully went away.
4. Do you feel your kin identity is influenced by external forces (e.g., energy, fate, deities)?
I guess sort of yes! I feel like even though my kintype started out human, I was always going to be oneiric, I was always meant to be oneiric. I was always destined to be the Dreamer.
5. How do you distinguish between your human self and your kin self, if at all?
I don't really, except for saying dream self vs wake self. Like I said before, I am different in dreams. I have my abilities, I have confidence, but I am also recognized as an outsider more. People ostracize me, being an outcast is a big part of my nonhumanity. I am not instantly treated like that in wake life, because I appear "normal" at first glance. Even if people probably sense my autism and therefore something "off". I am not sure if I still mind that. I definitely used to. But maybe not being normal and somehow something being off about me makes me a lot more interesting and I try to embrace it.
★ Expression and Creativity
1. Do you express your kin self through art, writing, music, or other creative outlets?
Writing!
2. If so, what mediums or themes resonate most with your kin identity?
I love journaling and writing about my alterhumanity. I also love reading other people's essays and just reflect on all of it. I also listen to a lot of music, as it helps me regulate and connect to a deeper level of alterhumanity.
3. Do you incorporate your kin identity into how you dress, decorate, or design your personal space?
A little, I really like dreamy themes and aesthetics. When it comes to decorating though, I prefer to keep it very simple, but I do choose colors I associate with dreams.
4. Are there specific symbols, colors, or aesthetics tied to your kin self?
Yes! Everything I connect to dreams, daydreams, sleep, fantasy and imagination. Such as the night, stars, the moon, clouds, comfy stuff, soft stuff, etc. The colors purple and blue. Auroracore.
5. Have you created a persona or character to embody your kin self? If so, describe it.
Yes, because my kintype looks like me in my early 20s, but I also see myself represented by a pastel purple dormouse. I also see myself with yellow eyes and purple or blue hair. These are indeed more persona's of myself. I don't actually have any art of this (yet). I like to make myself look more dreamy in picrews though.
★ Personal Reflections
1. What challenges have you faced as an Otherkin, and how have you overcome them?
Mostly internal shame about who I am. It is still a process to fully accept and embrace myself. Seeing other people be unapologetically themselves in the community really helped me. I wasn't completely honest about my experiences for a while, as I tried to fit some sort of mold. The "perfect" otherkin. I tried to only have one kintype and suppress the feelings of anything else. Now that I have embraced being constelic, I feel like I can breathe.
2. What joys or comforts has your kin identity brought into your life?
My dreams are everything to me. In them I get to be social, go on adventures, use magic. I don't know where I'd be today without them as I am very isolated in my illness and disability. My daydreams, imagination and fantasy have also kept me going through the day. I am very proud to be dream conceptfolk and oneiric.
3. Do you think being Otherkin has shaped how you view humanity and the natural world? How?
Humanity, yes. In dreams I have a bit of a superiority complex. But also, at first I tried to push my own humanity away completely and didn't want to acknowledge it at all. Now I am finding a better balance as I was born human as my kintype. I think humanity is pretty cool, as human brains can imagine and fantasize, and create so many realities.
4. How do you feel your identity might evolve in the future?
I have no clue. My journey has been such a roller coaster, I really don't know where it will go in the future.
5. What advice would you give to someone just discovering their Otherkin identity?
Take your time, and even though it is a very serious and important part of yourself, also have fun with it. Try and be honest to yourself and your experiences. Maybe they are common in the community, maybe they are unique, but you are not alterhuman any less for having a different experience. You may even find you're not alone at all, once you open up.
